Uncovering New States of Matter by Packing Lunch

October 6, 2011 1 By Tad Reeves
My daughter, holding her hermetically-sealed lunchbox

My daughter, holding her hermetically-sealed lunchbox


When I was in engineering school, lab experiments we conducted at Oregon State were able to unveil some shocking discoveries about phases of matter, proving that matter did indeed pass through several phases as temperature is increased, including:

1. Solid

2. Liquid

3. Gaseous

4. Plasma

5. Burger King Coffee

But now, after packing my daughter’s lunch each day, and being responsible for her classroom’s snacktime snacks on a rotating basis, I’ve rediscovered something I happened upon in grade school but was have to this date been unable to explain:

Bananas possess a property which allows their essence to pass through any solid matter containment system, and will then make EVERYTHING in a 18″ radius smell and taste like bananas.

I’m sure many of you have had a similar experience, but if not, try it. Cut up a banana, and put it in a thick-plastic, vacuum-packed, hermetically sealed, weapons-grade nuclear storage unit by tupperware. Pack that along with the rest of your lunch items.

I guarantee you, that due to the fact that banana essence meta-particles can actually warp through any solid matter, your graham crackers, PB&J, cookies, yogurt and even the soup you put in a bloody triple-layer stainless-steel thermos, will all TASTE LIKE BANANA.

Any physics types out there have a theory they’d like to put forth on how this is?